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Some Shred Of Optimism

by Hello Whirled

/
1.
Numbers Game 04:20
material it pulled the concentration out to a memory I wished I had forgotten ideal they’re washed beyond fabrication into a hibernation at least there was a day to seize don’t look forward too far everything grows naturally think too fast for maturity and complicate this order breaking down the border in this natural order we are merely porters realign the stars sleeping in our cars captivate in bars where the numbers mean nothing and nothing takes the stage the doors to freedom broken piss bottles line the cage where words just aren’t spoken chalk on the whiteboard ink on the blackboard we’re all getting bored are loading screens this long?
2.
in a landscape it all sounds the same everyone’s playing an identical game and it all comes off so cliché makes you wonder if there’s anything left to say won’t you color my potential please won’t you in a portrait cornered and bored need a little shout to drive important points home with compressed snares and distorted Strats it’s not rock and roll if it scares the cats
3.
Piss Track 03:24
I don’t care if you’re not having fun I don’t care if you’re scared and wish to run I don’t care if everything you ever do is number fucking one I don’t care if you’re on an upswing I don’t care if suddenly everything is working better for you what did you even do? I’m a believer in good taste was hoping you’d want to have some possessing the ability to stun a good time writing down the assembly line and all that’s inside is left to die your bones lost to time but keep telling yourself that lie I understand I’ve slipped up myself I understand I’ve sinned and belong in hell I’ll listen to everything you say because it’s always fucking true if the light that shines before me fades and I wake to find I’m on my last days tell the other dogs to go home and they’ll run back crying for you I’m a believer in good days but maybe I don’t deserve one roll up in the hospital into a nice bed with pentabarbitol to numb the head and all that’s inside is left to die you don’t have to cry let the elements take their time
4.
what you said to me had to be the worst thing you could do until you turned around me and made sure I was facing you out like a raincloud up like a landline under the daytime there’s another planet somewhere out there waiting for me and it’s waving in orbit so I can die happily she’s got a crest like a cathedral holy shit it’s something to see you need to believe me another planet’s where I need to be
5.
Reaching 01:50
you’re reaching far for a star you’ll never touch the moment is wasted and you’ve never tasted the glow you’re opened wide for a face you’ll never see smile the feeling is gone and you’re left with a crowd but no show afterwards you’ll still burn for a chance to see happily live in peace with the light aflame inside you and the days can’t help but ride you the moment is wasted and you’re at the end of the rope
6.
Your Door 05:01
I left a letter under your door I guess you weren’t there I waited for hours in my room it seems you didn’t care it’s okay I’m not bothered sure I tried to reach out but it’s your move the ball’s in your court and you’re not playing I can’t force you into a game we know I’ll only ever lose I can’t blame you for not taking it wasn’t quite shaking it wasn’t worth forgiving it I wouldn’t forgive me too I can’t blame you for not taking it wasn’t quite shaking it wasn’t worth believing it I wouldn’t believe me too I sent a carrier to your home it seems you’re never there are you somewhere else scared, alone? or am I too jealous to truly care?
7.
it’s another party tonight sorority basement, fun there’s drinks in the corner, overpriced but it helps to beat the confusion some bands I maybe care about but would never choose to hear was this the right night for this or is it a jarring shame? blitz me out til I forget my name down here it’s always the same not sure if now’s the time for flying everyone’s having fun around me but here I sit in space everyone’s having fun without me and I’m running last in the chase that one friend everyone else has whose presence makes me ill I don’t get why they keep him around but it makes me nervous still rather be in the kitchen crying don’t know that I’ll survive the night feel some shred of optimism dying what a night we could have had guess I wasn’t built for feeling glad tarot cards read breasted souls at the foot of a burning hill could it predict I’d pay five bucks for an hour of nothing worth the bill is it safe to run out into the night past the police checkpoint? jaywalk smooth, falling into the groove and everything’s all right but if that’s true then I’d be lying fallen, I’ve lost the day feel some shred of optimism dying
8.
body breaking curb stomping helmet bearing proud flag wearing pile of shit with bones metal guns royal blue truck with a skeleton on it tough display fuck your sunny day guts fabricated cards laminated lies all believing looks are deceiving bend or break one mistake leave you in the hospital at best or you’ll swim with the rest there’s war in the streets no more time for fucking around don your war paint
9.
take my hand tonight walk into the light where the shadows are so bright the air is thinning light out here out of sight I’ll tuck you in if that’s all right dresses left behind bet I lost my mind look for whatever you can find lost control, steered it blind here we stand resigned head on out to go unwind carry our souls around to the eye of the storm old friends from way back when never thought I’d see it again I can’t leave her to drown who knows when I’ll come back to this town I wanna see her again thunder right on cue I guess my presence’s due whatever goals I had went through is there nothing new? is this all they want me to do? I’m not out here to just lose you
10.
Bastards 02:37
bastard weep a towel thrown over their catch of the day bags fill with blood fall out the trunk as they motor away call for help services available for lighter than the sun but you receive hell if you let your kids use water guns you won’t care until you watch the body drop if you were really pro-life you’d stop supporting soldiers and cops they go home pulled pork on their plates tonight 40% will end the night giving black eyes thin blue line coated with red lying faceless names lying on their bedspread dying and it matters less “they’re just doing their best” but maybe the best is worst the only ones who have to get hurt are the bastards in the room it’s elephant season
11.
too much something to do pool full of productivity not feeling wet today can’t wake up to say I feel like an alien marching through a postwar street like a fever dream this blanket’s not enough to keep me asleep you can’t pretend that I care enough to climb down the stairs and you’re surprised sleep deprivation eyes feel the flame go burning out the ego there’s something in the middle looks at me, listens as I fall asleep sits in my dream lands reaches and slices my bony hands I feel like an animal chained up to a national post like an ancient ghost back up into history and find the lie

about

Recorded in Ewing and Mount Laurel.

"Piss Track" is a rewrite of an older song you may have heard
"Forest Nightwalk" is a new recording of an older song

credits

released May 21, 2019

Ben Spizuco - vocals, guitar, piano, bass, drums

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Hello Whirled Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Album count: 49.
Release count: 137.
Song count: 1447.

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